Two weeks ago, I turned 37. For the first time in a while, I wasn’t alone or feeling lonely (on a birthday). In fact, I now know I am in a good place.
Despite some of the chaos that’s been happening through the year, I find I am more secure and stable in who I am, what I want and where I am going. I am certain of the people I have surrounding me. I am certain there is a specific direction. I may not always know where I’m going to land, but I can say that the road I’m traveling has been a good trip thus far.
May 29th restored me. I shed some things I had been carrying for a while – doubt, uncertainty? Yeah – it was time to leave them where it came from. Best to send them right back. Serves no use most of the time. Or at least it wasn’t serving me.
Without further adieu, here are my “Thoughts on 37″:
- Being three (3) years away from 40 is a serious wake-up call.
- 37 is no different from any other year. It’s just I’m different. I’m a better me. Lens is clearer.
- I feel like a unicorn at 37. At 40 I plan to feel like a fairy or a fairy queen. When I was 25 I wasn’t even thinking about 40!! I’m staying young.
- I like to hear good news (see Philippians 4:8). If you’re a nay-saying bad news bringer, I’m not checking for you and you must exit stage left immediately.
- Time is more important, more precious. There is less time today than yesterday. I’m going to spend it in a good place.
- This doesn’t mean tears won’t be shed. Heartbreak isn’t a friend of mine. It does mean, I’m less tolerant of people who bring this into my life consistently.
- It also means being able to go through things without getting stuck. If there’s something happening, I need to get through it, experience it, process it, thank God I made it through it and then keep on walking. Never look back. I’m in no mood to turn into a pillar of salt.
- It also means being able to forgive.
- A disagreement doesn’t have to mean a dissolution (most times).
- Random: I’m wearing shades of red lipstick and loving it (you thought I was about to mention something about 50 Shades of Grey didn’t you? Nasty! Ha ha! Just kidding. Another story for another day). All this to say, it’s been important for me to break out of my comfort zone on some things.
- There is a lesson in it all. The good. The bad. The traumatic. The heart wrenching. I’m taking notes. I don’t like repeating classes.
- Motherhood and marriage are still close to my heart.
- It’s more important than ever to value my personal story and share it.
- My commitment to transparency and honesty is still a full-fledged journey. Although I’m honest there are still many secret chambers of my heart I keep locked away for safe keeping.
- My level of discernment is off the charts these days. If it ain’t right, it ain’t right. If it looks like a duck and quacks like a duck – guess what?
- Even though my discernment is off the charts, I really don’t know too much of shit anymore (ironic? yes. Crazy? No.). The longer I’m living I’m realizing there is so much more I don’t know than I do know.
- I am aware, more than ever, of my personal boundaries & deal breakers.
- As much as I love to teach and give, to help, there will be times I cannot teach, I cannot give or offer help. Sometimes I need to sit back, enjoy the ride and keep my mouth shut. In fact, many things don’t need to be fixed or tampered with by me. God’s got it under control. (see #16 on discernment)
- I am aware of things I can handle, tolerate, deal with, make work. I’m not talking myself into or out of what my gut is telling me to do or not to do.
- Sometimes, I’m not going to get an apology – and it’s ok. It’s not right, but it’s ok. I’m just going to have to press on. (See #8)
- God reeeeeeeaaaaaaallllllyyyyy loves me (and you). I can’t even begin to tell all the stories on here – I will divulge some about how He’s rescued and steered me all these years. Whew!!!
- Reading and prayer are keys to knowledge. As is surrounding myself with the people who I believe have wise counsel. I should never be afraid to ask for help or counsel especially when seeking the right people to help me. In other words, I’m not seeking water in the desert. I only ask those I know have been where I’m at and where I’m trying to go.
- Everything is fine, in right order – just as it is. Right now. Romans 8:28
Anyone else crossed this threshold? Can you feel me? My sisters over 40 – what was this time like in your life as you began to approach it? Any wisdom you can impart?